Repeat After Me.....We Can't...............

Repeat after me....."We Can't Change Others"

We can't change others.....but we can change how we receive them into our lives. We can change how their words and actions impact our lives.  I know, I know......some of you may be thinking that it is impossible to change how others words and actions impact us.  And to some level you may be right, or not. You see it is true that there is pain associated to how others treat us especially when we care for them.  However there it is also truth that when we reclaim our power and limit the impact; we take away the power from them to hurt us.  Question......wouldn't it be great to remove from them such power?  Of course it would, because they have no right to hurt us.  But how do reclaim when we can't change them?  Well, like I said we can only change us, therefore we must work with ourselves; find out why what they say and do hurts us so much.  Find why we allow their actions to hurt us.   Look, I am not referring to domestic violence or any other physical abuse and if you or someone you know is a victim of such, you need to seek immediate help.  But this message is not about abuse, its more in line with how we allow others to manipulate, talk down to us, disrespect or even embarrass us.  Yes, I know you may love them; however you must also love yourself enough to not allow anyone to treat you less than you deserve.   

I can tell you that years ago, people expected me to bend over backwards to please them even when I did not want to and I did.  But something changed the moment I began to respect and love me. Something changed the moment that people saw me standing tall and not second guessing my thoughts, words and intentions.  Those that once expected me to please everyone no longer do so. They understand that I am my own person, that I have my own ideas and visions and that I lead, not follow.

OK but again how?  Again I say, start with working on you.   Understand what is done that hurts, why you accept it and commit to yourself to demand better.  But don't focus your attention on them; instead demanding better is a requirement for all.  You are not to be treated as less, you are to be spoken to and treated with the same love as you give to them......so on that note, are you loving and caring? This would be a good time to look within and reflect on what you are giving to others as well.  You see when we know what we want in life and we give it, eventually that new way of being will be visible to others. It may take some time but how you think, speak and act will change and so will the way you carry yourself.  And once they see you walking tall and feeling assertive, how they speak and act with you will begin to change as well.

I never set out to change them....instead I changed Me. 

We can't change others but we can change ourselves and when we do, we WIN