Saturday, March 31, 2012

Writing: LIfe According to Me

Writing Life According to Me began as a journal.   It was meant to allow me to get clear on who I really was. I had been on a journey to self-discovery and although I felt motivated, there was so much about myself I did not fully understand.  This so called journal forced me to open up and be honest with ME. 

·         Who was I?

·         Why did I act or react as I did?

·         Who did I want to be?

·         What did I want out of life?

·         What would make me happy?

During this time, I was experiencing emotions of fear, uncertainty doubt and guilt.
I would find myself writing letting my pure emotions flow, and at times that would be tears.
As I continued this process, I was diagnosed with Anxiety and told that if I continued stressing as I was

I would cause myself a heart attack.  Heading home, I kept replaying the words……..”I will cause myself a heart attack”, then something fantastic happened.  At that moment I knew that IF I could cause a heart attack I could also prevent it.

I had just been giving a clean bill of health, I had no illness or concerns other than being a heavy woman.  Therefore It was all up to me and it ws time I made a decision.    It’s funny how you change when you feel pinned against a wall.

I wish I could explain to you what happened inside me yet I would not know where to begin.   Yet I know that understanding  that I had the power to either get better or worse, it was like flipping a switch in me and suddenly I was transformed.   All of a sudden

I could see,  I knew what I needed to do and I have not looked back since. 

To me looking back is only helpful when we look to see our growth.   Looking back and dwelling on past failures or sorrows only makes you relive those painful events and holds you back from moving toward your goals.

Writing Life According to Me, was the best thing that happened to me,  it saved my life from
the old ME.

Monday, March 26, 2012

Don't just wish it..make it happen

Saying you want to go on vacation and going on vacation are two separate things. One implies a wish/desire; the other is an action.

Do you just wish to go on vacation or do you?

· Set up a budget?

· Review your choices/destinations?

· Plan what to do and what to see?

· Make the arrangements?

I am sure you do these and more.

You don’t know for sure if vacation will happen planned as you don’t know what can happen from this moment till the time of vacation. However you commit your energy and focus toward this goal because you can visualize it and are certain of what you want, which is to go on “vacation”. You don’t just wish for it; you make it a reality.

This same process is what you need to follow with all your goals. Don’t just think it, work at it. Bring it from the fantasy world to the physical world.

Saturday, March 24, 2012


LIFE ACCORDING TO ME: Get organized: Good morning to you all on this glorious Saturday morning.    Today is a special day and we need to begin this day with a GREAT attitud...

Get organized

Good morning to you all on this glorious Saturday morning.  

Today is a special day and we need to begin this day with a GREAT attitude.

·         Thank the heavens for a new day -  gratitude is key to a fresh start
·         Get that coffee  (hehehe)
·         Give yourself a good hug in form of a stretch, get those muscles stretched – you going
  to get busy
·         Take out a notebook -  yes you going to do some homework
o   What make me, Me?  -  get clear on all the greatness, flaws, anything that makes you who you are. (all of it)
o   What do I think I want or need to be happy or satisfied?  -  be honest,  saying. “I have it all is not always the full truth” , if it is…great yet let this be a honest response (remember no one will check your answers other than you)
o   What is holding you back from your goals?  (money, lack of confidence ,etc.)
o   What will I commit to do starting RIGHT NOW to move forward toward my goals, my dreams?
·         Read your answers out loud and make any last minute tweaks if needed
·         Focus on the last question and make a decision to either:  (Your choice, there is no right or wrong decision….it is all up to you)
o   Begin RIGHT NOW to move forward
o   Sit back and wait to see what comes your way
·         Assuming you chose to “Begin RIGHT NOW to move forward
o   Make a TO DO list on the actions you need to take toward your goals
o   Prioritize them 
o   Some goals require multiple steps (break them up)  example
§  Go back to school
·         RESEARCH schools, options, careers financial, schedule
·         APPLY to school
·         Attend school

In this case you see how one goal requires multiple steps.  It is easier to identify the tasks
and tackle them.

You need to do this with all the goals that you have, this will allow you TODAY, to begin to organize yourself and come up with a plan. 

Ok….you got work to do………… are you in?   Well this is personal and only you will know if you are in or not.  Yet, REVIEW this exercise. You have nothing to lose, yet you have much to win, by getting yourself organized and ready to take on your goals.    This will help you bring your goals from the “I am think I should try……..” to the “I know exactly what I want and have to do”


Thursday, March 22, 2012

You make a difference

You play a role in this life.
You make a difference.
You are needed.

You might wonder what that role might be, yet I can tell you we all play a part. We all affect each other. No matter how much money, education or dedication you have you make a difference an impact on someone else. Life would not be the same without you. 

Have you ever disagreed with someone, remembered their words, and months or years down the line, those words made sense to you? That person which you did not agree with actually helped you down the line. He / She might not even know it or remember you, yet their words lived on.

Have you ever received a smile from a stranger which made you feel better? That person who gave you a quick smile might not remember you, they smiled out of courtesy, yet to you that smile meant the world, and it was a gift of hope. It could be as powerful as “someone saw me, I am not invisible”.
We all play a role, we all have a responsibility to each other, and we are all connected.

Don’t undervalue yourself, you mean so much more than you imagine.

Road maps / GPS:

Road maps / GPS:

When you think of a road map or GPS you think of it for road trips. You can’t imagine heading out and guessing your way to your destination. Well some might be more adventurous and might enjoy discovering how to get there...
on their own, yet most of us will want to know how to get there without the guess work.

The truth is that we need a road map / GPS in other areas of our lives as well.

• Financial independence
o Do you know how to get there?
o Do you have a Plan B incase Plan A does not go as expected?
o Are you and your loved ones protected in case of a death, disability or illness?
o Are you confident that you will be able to choose the lifestyle you want for your later years?
• Attaining your Goals
o Do you have a clear path to attain your goals?
o Do you know which actions need to be prioritized?
o Do you have a timeline or a check point to monitor your progress?

The truth is we need a road map to help us through many important life situations. Many times we are testing the waters as we go and wishing we make the right choices.

These topics are too serious to take them lightly, we have only RIGHT NOW to review our lives and determine where we are going. It is RIGHT NOW that we need to make the right choices and get ourselves on track.

Each day you wait; is a day wasted.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Live like you are dieing - Tim McGraw

I love this song.........

Live life to the fullest and do it now, in this moment which is the only time you really have.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

What do you REALLY fear?

What do you fear?

Speaking in public:
Do you fear:
• Being laughed at?
• Not capturing audience attention?
• Getting nervous, forgetting what you have to say?
• Not being liked?
• Not speaking clearly?
• Having all eyes on you?

Applying for a new job?

Do you fear:
• Interviewing process?
• Not knowing how to describe what you do?
• Starting over?
• Learning new things
• Not getting what you deserve?

Going back to school
Do you fear:
• Starting over?
• Being an older student?
• Being stuck in old mentality?
• Not being able to learn?

We can go on and on, you can fear anything in life. The question is do you UNDERSTAND the true source of your fear?

Find what you fear and analyze it as I did above…….try to answer the questions to your fear. This will help you get clear and will allow you to work on reducing /eliminating that fear.

Give it a try. The worst thing that happens is that you LOSE your fear and REGAIN your confidence. Hey, you never know unless you try.

Monday, March 12, 2012

I am going to take you back in time to the moment of my transformation. I was serving Grand Jury and my life was a mess. I was seriously in debt, had no way to get a loan due to BAD CREDIT and we were in trouble. I was sitting in Grand Jury listening to people that had done things out of desperation and even though I was not one of them, I felt afraid. Afraid of feeling that desperate, knowing... I was there or very close. I was not sleeping, constantly crying and just had no answers. I was already on my journey to a better me yet, I had failed at one thing. I DID NOT BELIEVE IN MYSELF.

I began to get nervous, would have what i call "hot flashes" that would come over out of fear, I was not sleeping as my mind could not rest and I did not dare speak about this to no one. I was breathing hard and I began to fear a heart attack.

I called my sister and told her I was scared and together we went to the doctor. I had tests done, they sent me for blood work and was told i was very healthy yet I was experiencing ANXIETY. My Doctor told me that many people were experiencng the same issues I was AND that if i continued to focus on my problems I WOULD CAUSE MYSELF A HEART ATTACK.

I went home feeling good about being healthy however her words kept repeating in my mind. " I will cause a heart attack". as I kept hearing the words, my next thought was "I can cause myself a heart attack OR i can avoid it by taking control". Right there and then I knew without a doubt that I had to CHANGE, that I COULD NO LONGER take the pain, and that IT WAS UP TO ME.

i have never been the same person since. I am better, stronger, wiser from the moment I CHOSE to take control.

My journey has been almost 3 years in the making.......YET IT TOOK that one incident, that one moment, the knowing I could no longer live that way. to transform myself.
I share this with you, because we ALL have issues, we all have excess baggage. It's not the issues we have, but how we deal with them that matters. Whatever you might be experiencing today, please hang in there. You will change, you will get better, but first you need to find that moment, you need to find yourself.

One thing I learned is that you can't fix anything when you are stuck in your negative thoughts. You can't think clearly when all you see is darkness around you. As difficult as it might sound you need TO NOT give up and SEARCH within YOU for the answers to your problem.

You can do this.....don't give up on you.
At times we lack in faith, we say we believe in our higher source, however we have our doubts. Do you agree? If you don't, then i ask, when was the last time you believed beyond doubt that your problems would be resolved? When was the last time you relaxed although not being sure what was coming next? The truth is that many times our faith is tested and we don't pass the test, we don't because our pain, our fear is greater than our faith. I know this because I was there not too long ago. Faith is something we need to practice on a daily basis. We need to practice our belief in our Higher Source, for me that is God, and we also need to practice our belief in ourselves.

Your inner voice is your connection to your Higher source.
When you open your mind and heart you can hear that voice Your inner strength is your connection to your Higher source. When you believe, you push forward because you are empowered.

Open your heart, quiet your mind, explore your inner being, get to know who you are and get reconnected to life.

Just Do It

Just Do It........

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Believe in YOU

BELIEVE is an exercise which requires practice. Some days will be better than others and it will require you to be committed to this exercise in order for you to be successful. We have spent too many years with our old beliefs, doubts and experiences thus being very difficult for you to just snap your fingers and change your belief system. However with focus and determination you CAN DO IT.

You have the ability to meet your goals, get clear on what those goals are, then analyze your current situation.

Identify your main goal, and then break it up into smaller goals.

Example - Do you want a new career?

New Career:

- Education:

o online training

o instructor led training

o professional books / magazines

o learn about the career (get to know what is required from you)

o Take on small responsibilities that will help you learn more of this career.

- Play / Act the part:

o Study those that have the career you want

o Dress as you would if in that line of work

o be prepared

You can do this with any goal. By breaking up your goal into smaller goals, you can begin tackling them without allowing yourself to become frustrated. Remember until you feel confident in yourself, this will require you to practice; that is where smaller goals will help you.

Monday, March 5, 2012

As seen on Youtube
I go over the 3 key words and what the mean to me in my journey to self discovery.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Painful events

I was getting ready this morning and a thought came to me. Not sure why, however here it goes.

Sometimes we feel victimized by outside forces and we can’t really understand and make sense of it. We feel hurt or attacked by our family, friends, society and even our court systems (the LAW).

When we talk about becoming accountable for our lives, we can’t honestly expect to look for accountability in EVERYTHING that happens as something’s are out of our control. However that is for the individual to know as we all go over our events to make sense of how things happened.

This now leads me to FORGIVENESS. If you have read some of my posts I talk about forgiveness not as a tool to forget or to reconnect with the one(s) that hurt you, instead I talk about forgiveness as a tool to let go of the pain that you feel, forgiving yourself for any emotion that is holding you captive to this event and releasing into the world. You see, when we feel hatred, when our pain is great, we can’t see anything other than the darkness associated with the event. I don’t attempt to understand all painful events as I have not experienced many issues that others have, however I do know from my own experience that re-living our pain on a daily basis keeps us trapped.
I believe that if we were blessed with a new day, then we need to be able to live that new day.

Forgiveness is key….again it’s not to forget and its not to reconnect with the cause of pain, it’s to allow you to live again; letting go of the pain.

I feel in my heart to tell you that your pain is real, but God loves you and is here for you. You are not alone, you just feel alone because of the pain, because of the darkness that surrounds you. Yet God is there with you extending his hand out to you. Forgive, Release and place your Faith in God and he will take you out of your darkness.

God bless you All, especially those who this message might be for.

Friday, March 2, 2012

Be accountable, take charge.

I am responsible for..........
I am liable for..............
I have, I did, I went, I spoke, I looked, I thought, I altered, I.........
You can make up your own. The message here is that we need to be accountable for our thoughts, words and actions. If you look at any event, it is very rare you did not play a part.

I did not ignore that text,
I answered that call
I yelled back
I retaliate against my spouse, child or boss or neighbor

Think back at any event (painful or not), see what your role was and what you could have done differently.

In life there are people that will push your buttons, could be anyone (family, friends, co-worker, etc); getting to understand their impact on our mood or attitude, and how we react, can give us the upper hand. It can empower us to reduce the opportunity for these encounters. Remember, you can't change anyone other than yourself. You can't work to improve how someones mind works, however you have FULL control over YOU.

Be accountable, take charge.

Is this worth it?

When we retaliate against others we are giving more of what we received, thus just going in circles. Simple, “They piss us off, we return the favor, they will come back as to not let it end, and you must continue as you will not allow them to have the last laugh.” This cycle is repeated every day with different players from all walks of life. Many of us don’t realize the pull this ridiculous game has and which keeps us STUCK in a negative state of mind.

While you are in this sentiment, focusing all your energy on getting back at the other, you are not creating the great life you could have. Instead you are giving more power to the current situation and creating more of it.

Is this worth it?

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Just Do It
Awesome speach given in 1987....... One you need to watch..

Stay focused

To reach the TOP you must begin at the BOTTOM
There is no shortcuts, no easy way. You must be ready, willing and able to do the work.  Witn every step you take, you suffer a stumple, a roadblock, a detour, yet that does not matter, because every step you take with determination, with commitment, will help you contiue upward.

Stay focused and be faithful, your journey to the TOP begins at the BOTTOM.

Parenting is not EASY

Being a parent is a tough job.  You find yourself wishing that your kids eventually appreciate what you do for them and you wish they learn the lessons without falling to hard.   You find yourself wanting to protect, yet you don’t help them if you spare them from all the experiences life has to offer.  

I am very close to my kids, yet I find myself in a constant struggle with my oldest as he is in his early twenties and feels that he has all the answers.   He has an attitude and a mouth to go with his beliefs, very stubborn and as you can imagine will not listen.   Sound familiar?  Well, I know I was that kid several years ago, except for the “mouth” as my parents were no joke.  

What can I do?  Not much at this time. I must wait for him to come around.   I must stay open as a loving Mom so that when he does come around, I am here to receive him with open arms.   I am far from a perfect Mom….I know that I have made mistakes and I also know that “I don’t know everything”.  Yet I also know that I love my kids more than they will ever know.   Let me stop myself there…..they will one day know it well, as they will have children of their own and they will love those kids as much as I love them today.

To all the parents out there reading this…..please
do not give up on your kids….NO MATTER how tough it gets.   Some kids are tougher than others and require more time to turn around.   Our love must be persistent throughout time.  One day, they will come around, might be in a day, a week, a month, a year or several years….. We must be patient and faithful.  

Our kids need us, even if they don’t know it.

Reviews of my book

I find it scary to search for reviews, although so far so good.  Today I saw one that was quite funny from a Man who seems to have been forced into reading.   Don't know how that happened, as I have yet to convince my husband to read my book.   HA HA  I guess this lady has skills, she should be writing her own book. 

I am going to attempt to share the reviews, however in case it does not go through correctly, I will add the link.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Life According To Me: My Life Experiences, February 22, 2012
This review is from: Life According To Me: My Life Experiences (Paperback)
I enjoyed reading this book. The Author inspired me to take a look at how I was dealing with the events in my life and how I can remove the negativity and replace it with a positive outlook. Even though my responsibilities have not changed my life is less stressful.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Life According To Me: My Life Experiences, February 22, 2012
This review is from: Life According To Me: My Life Experiences (Paperback)
I highly recommend reading this book. This is a true heartfelt look into a persons life experiences. While reading this book, I could totally relate to the issues this author came across in her life's journey. Please take the time to read this. It will help you shed a light on any of your personal experiences you may be going through right now or have gone through.

SUPER BOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

True beliver in Life According to Me
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Sincere and heartfelt, February 22, 2012
This review is from: Life According To Me: My Life Experiences (Paperback)
Great read. I enjoyed this book very much. The writer shares her experiences and lessons learned throughout some difficult times in her life. It is inspirational and makes you realize you are not alone, that others have similar issues to yours, and that you just have to keep going, and never give up. I highly recommend this book to everyone.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Life According To Me: My Life Exprience, February 22, 2012
This review is from: Life According To Me: My Life Experiences (Paperback)
What an inspirational book! I took away so many lessons and ideas that I can apply to my life to really turn it around. It's an easy and pleasurable read and the stories are relatable to my own real life situations today. I highly recommend this to anyone who just needs a little help getting thru a rough patch. I also plan on giving this book as gifts to my friends and family.
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3.0 out of 5 stars Life According to Me: My Life Experiences, March 1, 2012
This review is from: Life According To Me: My Life Experiences (Paperback)
I normally don't like to read, but my wife recently purchased this book through the Authors website and pushed this book on me.
This book starts out like a journal in where the writer talks a lot about accountability. I like that, as I felt she was connecting with both woman and man. She was not telling us about the woman's perspective but talking to us both as people. I was able to keep reading with interest. It was also nice to see someone who is not telling us about their "success", but about her recovery and confidence in her journey.

This is not your common self help book, the writer is not someone who made it to the top and is now telling us what we do wrong, and instead it's someone like my wife and I that has problems but has a positive outlook of life and is ready to make things happen.

As I said, I don't care for reading but I must admit this was an interesting, easy book to read. I did not feel preached to which is perfect as I would have put down the book. If you ask me my favorite part of the book, is it's not about who is right or wrong, it's about taking ownership for whatever your part is. I think this book will do well.
Good luck to the Author and thanks for the kindness in your message.
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