Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Your Journey

Your journey is about you.  Sound harsh?
Well it is.  You need to know who you are and what you want in life.  If not, you will continue making the same mistakes and will not be able to help those around you.

For your journey to a better life, you will need the following tools:

·        Clarity on YOU
·        Set of goals
·        Commitment
·        Determination
·        Faith

The rest will come to you, however you need to stay focused. 

Success begins with Trying

Success begins with trying.

Will you stumble, will you fall?  Yes
Will you reach your goals quickly? Most likely NO
Will you feel frustration and/or pain?  Yes
Will trying be worth it?  YES, YES, YES!!!

You can’t live a full life without trying to do new things, without trying out for the life you want.

Taking chances is part of the game and it is part of growing.   You need to commit to this game; you need to be in it to win. 

If life is a game, you are the player
If life is a story, you are the writer
If life is a movie, you are the lead actor

You are the main character in your life, and it’s up to you to keep trying to get what you want.

Every time you try, you get stronger.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Keep trying

All your efforts are not in vain, something is happening. Trust me, something is happening.....your efforts are expanding your knowledge, your strength, pushing you further than you thought possible.

Sunday, February 26, 2012


Families are unique. Some families are composed of blood relatives, others are based on good friendships that are stronger than blood. Today, families can have a Mom and a Dad or two Dads or two Moms or have multiple races all mixed in one.........

Families are people that are united in LOVE, true LOVE.
Family provides support, understanding, acceptance and most of all "FAMILY" will be with you no matter what.

No matter what your family looks like, give thanks for the family you have.
Cherish them and take care of them as your time with them is uncertain, yet your love for them should be eternal.


Procrastination = Wasted time

Every time you put off doing something till tomorrow you are making a choice to waste valuable time.
Why would anyone make that choice?   There is no moment like the current moment to do that which you need to do, especially if you feel inspired to start something. Let's face it,  this moment is the time in which your thoughts are clear, you are ready to go.  Tomorrow you have no guarantee you will have the motivation, or focus to do what you need to do.  You don't know where you will be or what challenge you will be facing tomorrow. Therefore the only good time is NOW.

Stop procrastination......take action NOW

Your relationship with God

Your relationship with God is personal.
There is no “ONE SIZE FITS ALL”. It’s about you and him, no one else. There is no judge and jury other than him, therefore in your relationship with him, don’t mind others opinions or beliefs.

Reach out to GOD as you are, just like you are.
Be open to change, yet let your relationship with him be what guides you to change. Don’t force the change; don...’t force yourself to be what you are not. When you come to GOD as you are and with total confidence in him, he will guide you to where you need to and want to be.

Again…if you take anything out of what I just wrote, let it be; “Your relationship with God is personal, there is no right or wrong way”.


Relationships are hard and require work.If you are married and think that because you are married you don’t have to dedicate time to the other, you are in for a rude awakening.

Dedicating time is not just being in the same room at the same time, watching the same TV show. It’s about communication and working together on your family goals as well as on your “individual” goals. It’s knowing that you can depend on the other even when you don’t share some of the same interests.

Relationships, no matter what your status is, takes work. If you are in a relationship and you are not willing to work, good luck with your relationship, cause you will need lots of LUCK.

If you are in a relationship and you are trying to change your spouse or partner…..Please UNDERSTAND, that you can’t change another, you can only change yourself and hopefully work TOGETHER so you both can live in harmony.

My Kids

My kids will forever be my biggest joy, yet they don't always know it as their young age does not let them see or value the love that comes from good parents.   I know this and I understand that this is part of life. 

It makes me sad at times, yet i hold on to the good moments shared with them.

My kids are my life, my everything and I will always be here for them. 

Change starts from within

You want to know how to change the world?
It starts by changing yourself.   Improving yourself, giving the best there is in your heart that is how we start.    We impact others with our thoughts, words and actions, thus, if you give kindness, you are helping someone find faith and hope, thus giving that which he/she receives. 

Change starts from within, be the change.
- Eileen Gonzalez

Ok…so you are ready to take the next step, and then it shows up…. “FEAR”.    You want to push forward but not sure how.   It’s really simple.

Take one step at a time, yet don’t stop. 
Track your steps, track your progress.   Use a checklist if necessary but push yourself.   You will find that tackling one step at a time; will get you where you want to be.

Fear will show up, that is guaranteed, however you can CONTROL it by not giving in to fear.

My journey to a better ME

My journey began with the following:

1. Getting clear on who I was and what I wanted.
2. Working on my belief system (faith)
3. Pushing myself to take action toward the things I
    wanted and which I felt I could do.
4. Staying the course, not giving up
5. Keep pushing myself in the moments of weakness

I found that you know what you have to do, yet you need to continue pushing yourself forward. Your journey to a better life, person, is not simple. You are guaranteed to find bumps in the road, detours, and heartache. However if you keep pushing forward despite what is tossed your way, you are guaranteed to discover a better, stronger, wiser YOU.

My journey has not been easy, yet it has been the best journey I have taken in my life. I have learned that this journey will not end, as when I reach my current goals, I create new ones. That is life, constant movement.

If you want more information on how to begin this great journey, you can reach me at

Saturday, February 25, 2012

You are not always liked

In life not everyone will like you, they won't all think highly of you.
Some don't like you for your behavior; others don't like you for their own personal reasons. If your case is the latter, then you can't do much about that and should not give it another thought. If your situation is the prior and its your behavior that causes dislike, then you should think about correcting your behavior.

You can't control how others feel about you, however you do have control of your life, your thoughts, your emotions and your actions. Give unto others as you wish to receive, no less.

However if you find yourself giving all you can and you still are met with dislike, then move on because that person does not play an important role in your journey.|

Be happy in life, give love to others and most importantly to YOURSELF.
If you don't love yourself, you can't give true love to others.

Friday, February 24, 2012

What do you choose?

I choose to believe in myself. I choose to believe in my potential. I choose to learn from my mistakes and try again. I choose to live life according to me. What do you choose?

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Be thankful

Take some time to just be thankful for everything around you.
Look for the good in things, as when you don't you miss out on greatness

Do you ever feel like no one can help you?
Do you feel doomed to live more of the same?

I know that feeling, which makes you sick to your stomach.  You feel no one cares, or they just don't understand.  If you are feeling that way, you are not alone.  It might feel that way, yet you are not.

Speak to someone, tell them of your worries or concerns.  Don't think of yourself as a burden, because those people around you love you, and want to see you well.  I have personally learned lessons in my life that helped me go from being afraid in my life and feeling trapped to feeling empowered to do and try new things. I now understand that my fear and my negative thoughts were my limitations. 

You are not alone,  find someone that can help you even if its just to listen to you.
You can try a family member, a friend, your church, a mentor or you can even email me if you just need
someone to vent to.   

Does it feel like you are sinking quickly?

Does it ever feel like you are sinking quickly and have no way to stay afloat?

Titanic was a tragedy in which many lives were lost, yet that was not a feeling; that was an event.

There are times that we allow our feelings of fear, and hopelessness to take on a shape of their own, leaving us weak and vulnerable. ... Read this again……pay attention to the words, “we allow”. The same way that we allow our feelings to control our actions, we could also decide to “take control” and say the words and do the things that will get us back on track.

We have that power, we have the last say. Don’t let your emotions get in the way of your life. You owe it to yourself to be the Captain of your ship and stay on course.   
-Eileen Gonzalez

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Writing is new to me

Writing blogs and writing books is all new to me. I never imagined I would be doing this or enjoying it as much as I do.

About me....

My name is Eileen Gonzalez, I am 43 years old. My husband and I have been married for 21 years; we have 2 kids (boy & girl). I love my family, would do anything for them and I have to admit I have made tons of mistakes in my life. I constantly think about both my kids’ future, especially my Marine Son who is on his own living far away from us. My kids have seen us struggle and I do not want that type of life for them. For this reason, getting to clear on ME; not only helps me get back on my feet, but it will help my kids know there is a better way

Throughout my postings you will notice I refer to myself as if everything were my decision, my mistake, and my progress. The reason I do this, is that in the past my husband and I would point fingers at each other but never took responsibility for our actions. This only led to more pain and more mistakes. It's taken some time, but I now understand that I am a "work in progress" and that I am constantly creating my life. I have known sadness, frustration, hopelessness and anxiety; however these feelings have been a direct result of my actions. I have learned that as painful as it is for me to admit it, I have had a leading role in all the good, the bad and ugliness in my life. Changing the way I address our problems, has made our relationship stronger; as we both now recognize our mistakes and understand that it’s up to us to do better. Sincerely believe that my attitude will determine the type of life I live.
I am not the same person I was......I have learned my lessons and I am very proud of my new found focus in life. I am still not where I need to be, however I am well on my way.

In this blog I want to share my lessons with you and tell you "there is a better way" and it all starts with YOU. We came to this world with all the tools needed to succeed. Remember; God only makes perfection, and you are his best creation.

Recalculating does not mean you don't reach your destination.
It just means you take another route.

Be clear on your Destination (Goals)

There is no journey without a destination.
You need to be clear on your goal(s) in order to set out and reach them.
If you are not sure of what your destination is, it's time you figure that out.
Life keeps moving fast and it will do so whether you figure out your life or not.
Please take time to get clear on who you are and what you want in life.
Do it for you.....YOU DESERVE BETTER!

It's Hump day....WOO HOO

Happy Wednesday Everyone!
If your week has not been as smooth as you expected, no worries.
The weekend is only 3 days away :)

Make today a great day!

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Stress & Meditation

Stress has an impact to your emotional and physical health. Meditation can help.

I personally need to learn how to meditate, however I am able to quiet my mind and connect to my inner voice and feelings.

Find something that can help you reduce your stress.

Here are “some” related issues to Stress:

• headaches
• heart disease
• sexual dysfunction
• emotional disorder
• backaches
• insomnia

KAIZEN Concept

KAIZEN is a very effective concept which can also be applied to our day to day living. How? You need to identify all the things you do that add NO value to your life and which hold you back or delay you from doing the things that do matter. Again, at work the processes are more complex, yet the concept is easy to follow and translate into our daily lives.

LIFE ACCORDING TO ME: It's ok to feel fear

LIFE ACCORDING TO ME: It's ok to feel fear: Did it scare you? Yes Did it stop you? NO You are guaranteed to feel fear at some point, but you are also guaranteed to get stronger pushing...

It's ok to feel fear

Did it scare you? YesDid it stop you? NO

Don't give fear more power than it deserves.


Transformation is like magic......
You work toward something but for some reason you don't see change....yet you are changing, it’s just not visible to the eye. Then as you continue to push forward regardless of not seeing change, it AHA moment and your eyes finally open, your ears can hear clearly, your heart expands with love and gratitude. Change happens, you are transformed.

I lived this and I wish I could truly explain the wonderful feeling it left in me.
It took over two years for my transformation to take place.  I remember struggling with myself, wanting to take hold of the new beliefs, yet feeling trapped by my old limiting beliefs.  I remember pushing forward despite my struggle,  and I remember that in my moment of most pain, in where I felt I could no longer do it alone.  At them moment in where I was desperate and afraid, it happened, I was transformed and my life has never been the same since.

I thank God for how the transformation took place in my life as I see it as a true miracle in my life.  Even as I write, I can't explain the feeling of it all as I feel that when it happened I was lifted from where I was into a better place,  I came face to face with my pain and yet it was no longer painful.  

If you are reading this and you are on your journey to a better life, don't be discouraged by your struggle.  It's part of your journey and part of your healing process.  It took a long time for you to be where you are today and it will take a while for you to get to where you want to be.  Hold on to your faith and your determination as it will get you through this time.

Stay will be transformed

Monday, February 20, 2012

Give freely

Sometimes we think we don't have enough to give, thus we look the other way paying no attention
to the pain that surrounds us.   However we always have something to give.  Those that need don't always need money, they need companionship, they need someone to talk to,  someone to cry with, someon that will tell them they care.   We all can help someone, yet until we take the time to listen to what the other needs we will not know how simple it is to help.

Money comes in handy yet, money needs to be an constant source.  Your friendship, your love, your time can be more valuable than the money you can share.   Your mentoring, can help someone get back on their feet to do what they need to do.  

If you take the time to listen, you will see how easy it is to help someone in need.

Forgive but not forget

Forgive but not forget.  
The truth is I can forgive you for pain, yet I will be careful trusting you next time.
That is natural, when they say put the other cheek, it does not mean you need to volunteer the other cheek.    Forgiveness in general is very important in our journey to a better person.  It's really not about releasing the other person but more of releasing yourself from your anger, your hard feelings.  Forgiving, can allow you to move on and focus on the things that really matter in your life and add quality to your life and others. 

If you are holding on to old grudges or angers, your focus is on that event which lives in the past. It has no use in your present time other than holding you back.  Therefore holding a grudge, refusing to forgive as much as it can sadden another, it is really hurting YOU.

I understand that some events are very difficult to get past, such as a crime against you or your family. For those types of events you might need counseling to help you release your emotions.  However we tend to hold on to little stuff that don't measure up to "crime" and yet we add fuel to it and make it bigger than it really is. can't move forward as long as you are holding and nurturing those negative events.
Forgiveness is about releasing yourself from the emotion.

I have felt wronged in my life and some events have hurt more than others, yet, I learned that they did not matter next the things I truly valued.   I learned to let go, I learned to forgive.   Forgive does not mean that I forgive and we go back to living as if nothing ever happened.   It means that I forgive and move on,  and moving on might not necessarily include the offender.  

Be open to forgiving, you will be the one to gain the most.
Someone always loves you......
When you are feeling lonely and feel that no one can help you, know that someone loves you. When you feel trapped with no where to go, knows that someone loves you. When you feel like you can't take it anymore and you need a way out, KNOW THAT SOMEONE LOVES YOU.

It might feel as if you are alone....yet that is not true. Someone loves you and wants to help you, but they can't if you don't let them.

Talk to someone, anyone......but don't ever give up.....cause someone loves you

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Ask, Believe and Act

‎3 Essential steps for your journey to a better you

• Ask (be clear on what you want)
• Believe (believe you deserve it, believe you can have it)
• Act (take action)
Step 1: Begins with getting clear on who you are and what you want. This process might take a while as you are currently dealing with old beliefs, attitudes, and unfortunate circumstances that currently affect your life.

• Who am I?
• Why do I think this way?
• Why do I act this way?
• What do I want?
• Why do I want it?
• What does having it mean to me?
• Do I believe I can have it?
• Do I believe I deserve it?
• Do I believe I can attain it?

It’s important to focus on your recovery, not get stuck on the problems you currently have, as focusing on your problems will surface emotions of lack and frustration which keep you where you are.

Getting clear can take a while as you will need to face your old mindset vs. who you want to be. However it can be done, and when it is, you will feel a new person.

Ok… you got clear on whom you are what you want and during this process you set your goals.

Step 2: Having faith in you is essential. You need to believe and understand that you have all the tools you need “within you”. Now that might sound difficult, because if you had them all along, then why did they not show up before? The answer is simple; “you did not believe”, your focus and emotions were stuck on “lack”. Therefore, now that you have a clear vision of who you want to be, you need to control those old emotions and believe in your ability to attain.

Step 3: Act….you can’t force action, however inspired action comes from being clear and believing you can attain. You will be driven to take action, opportunities will arise, ideas will pop in your mind, and you will feel an urge to try new things. Does not matter how it happens, you will be inspired to take action. Action can be, (training, education, learning a new job, etc). You must be ready to take action when the time comes up.

Lack of action will delay your goals.

These 3 steps are essential and work together….
Your journey of self discovery is the best journey you will ever take…….so enjoy the ride.

We are all Authors of our lives

We are all writing our own books.....we are the author, the writer and the leading role. We write our story with every laughter, every tear, every frustration, every triumph and every failure. Our stories are always in the NOW...,as we write our story day by day, moment by moment. Your can't write the chapter of your future, because you are not there yet. However you can write your TODAY an...d make the decisions that will make for a better tomorrow.

You are the author, the writer of your book, your life......don't take this role lightly.
Make this the best book you ever read......make it a wonderful story of happiness and success.

God bless you on your journey.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Life According to Me (Book)

You can order your book today     

Life According to Me is about me coming to terms with who I truly am and understanding what I want in life. Many times we go throughout life thinking we know who we are and what we want, yet what we believe about ourselves is tied to beliefs that have been engrained in us from our parents, society ...
and our own experiences. We begin to accept limitations as if we were... destined to have what we have; and nothing more.

I embarked on a journey of self discovery and with it, I became clear on the mistakes I had made and what I needed to do to get better. I found that getting on the right path required me to change my thinking and how I reacted to life in general.

In this book ,“Life According to Me”, I share this journey of self discovery with the intent to share the gift of hope and faith with the reader. It’s an honest look at my life (mistakes, lessons and road to recovery).

Writing this book has been a labor of love and determination. The inspirational blog was inspired by this book, and I want to share with others these positive thoughts since that was, for me, the beginning of it all.

Pre Order today:
Paper back $16.95
Hardcover $23.99