Monday, February 20, 2012

Forgive but not forget

Forgive but not forget.  
The truth is I can forgive you for pain, yet I will be careful trusting you next time.
That is natural, when they say put the other cheek, it does not mean you need to volunteer the other cheek.    Forgiveness in general is very important in our journey to a better person.  It's really not about releasing the other person but more of releasing yourself from your anger, your hard feelings.  Forgiving, can allow you to move on and focus on the things that really matter in your life and add quality to your life and others. 

If you are holding on to old grudges or angers, your focus is on that event which lives in the past. It has no use in your present time other than holding you back.  Therefore holding a grudge, refusing to forgive as much as it can sadden another, it is really hurting YOU.

I understand that some events are very difficult to get past, such as a crime against you or your family. For those types of events you might need counseling to help you release your emotions.  However we tend to hold on to little stuff that don't measure up to "crime" and yet we add fuel to it and make it bigger than it really is.   

Remember......you can't move forward as long as you are holding and nurturing those negative events.
Forgiveness is about releasing yourself from the emotion.

I have felt wronged in my life and some events have hurt more than others, yet, I learned that they did not matter next the things I truly valued.   I learned to let go, I learned to forgive.   Forgive does not mean that I forgive and we go back to living as if nothing ever happened.   It means that I forgive and move on,  and moving on might not necessarily include the offender.  

Be open to forgiving, you will be the one to gain the most.

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